这几天连续的几件事把感情推向危险的边缘，吾爱已尽，已经不知道该怎么办了，闺蜜说让我放弃因为她了解我，哈哈~~~~ 明天去谈判，不知会怎样。 吾已不知如何是好，哀哉。

疯了呵呵~~~ 今天在学生那里看到一句话，是写在hello kitty的笔上“Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened........" 这句话来的恰恰好。 很清楚是我的不好，固执，任性，唯我独尊，胆小，不安，没自信，很难完全投入自己的感情。应该说我不配被人爱，不懂的爱别人的人，不会得到永久的爱。所以不应该继续霸占的他，狠狠心，咬咬牙，放他走，说不定是对他的成全，对自己的残忍。但是其他人不会这样想，他们会认为是我伤了他的心，我是坏女孩。我不下地狱谁下地狱，太讽刺了。

如果明天一切顺利，这件事会随雾散去，阴影还是会留下。想要挽留，有想长痛不如短痛。人太复杂了，贪婪。

You always protect me since the day I born, don't let anyone or anything to hurt me. But you never know sometimes you hurts me the most. I cant even hate you, because you are my dad, because I love you. So I blame myself for not being a good girl, didnt try to understand you....And I am sorry, pls forgive me.

really it isn't his fault, cos I told him to hand out with friends more often instead of me................ I dun know what I want already......All my fault............

12.05 am just reached home and I am still crying, my tears cant stop coming down...haha~~~ I know I should not cry but I really cant stop it........I am sorry~~~~~~~~~

So ytd was his game cosplay competition, he won, he was so excited. So excited until he almost forgot about me, I know it is not his fault. But I just want to hug him.... told him I am so happy for him. I dun want his prize, I just want him to give me a chance to hug him.

From 3+ in the afternoon I reached there, but he is not himself, at least not my anata, I cant have him, cos so many ppl wanted to take his photo, well I really happy for him. Then just a kiss, I know his busy, very busy, and I cant help him, I cant do anything for him. I played BANG with them, but my eyes always looking for him, always. Because of him I cancelled my tuition, when he is on the stage, I wished he will hug me 1st, but he just walked pass me and asked for help to take out his wing....

I told myself that wing very heavy, his should take out 1st. After he dress down, 1st thing he ask me is abt him wallet and hand phone, den came to me ask where is his prize...haha~~~den walk off.... At the moment, I really cant take it...feel that the prize really more important than me or more important than give me a hug..... I was very angry..........den I start to emo....emo walking.....emo following him, while I was at the back and he was far far in front..... ps me....oh~~~that is one more kiss when we were walking out the hall....haha~~~~~that's it.............................. emo emo emo emo....... and the most angry part was after dinner, finally he rmb to hug me, I was so happy that I can finally hug him den he walked off again...........one and only time he put his arm around me for just 10 secs.....haha...........And I wanted this hug from the start.............how pathetic................

Maybe I just expect too much from him............

MY BAD MY BAD MY BAD MY BAD...I expect too much....I should not want that much.....知足常乐

one more thing, 1st time he sit opp me when we go out have dinner as a big group.....haha.....maybe i think too much......

Couples do quarrel a lot, we quarrel again, but this time he learned from me which is turn off his phone. He must be very mad at me. Well cant help!!!╮(╯▽╰)╭

This is a sign, our honey month is over. One day we will break up, cos he cant get it any more. Cos I am the one who really make him go mad. He said his numd already. Sooner or later, I hope I can be prepared. Haha~~I know that is all my fault, maybe 80%. But I dun want to change that. That is who I am, I am not going to change for any one, even that means I have to spent my whole life with myself.

I know I am cold, cruel. But deep inside I still believe I am a good girl. What I did is just trying to protect myself getting hurts. So I go to hurt others. I am self ship but I am always a good friend to everyone.

NO ONE IS PERFECT. I AM NO ONE.

feels like to write something,but i can post on facebook, he will see that. Even though i told him this blog before, well i dun think he did save this web.....haha what am i talking about?

Obviously, our honeymoon is over, so now is trying to make sure this relationship can last.

I really dun like holiday, yes I can have a break. Everyday stay at home alone, feels bored, playing games. However, camp is coming soon.... something to look forwards~~~~~~ He does not like I am going to camp.... He say I dun give him security. I dun know what did i done to make him feels that way.... Well maybe I just to "delicious" haha

I want freedom!!! I am tired emotionally, but somehow feels happy, you know there is someone love you, care about you and maybe crazy about you. That means you are not no one. You are important to someone.

Just random thoughts nothing else......

Happy holiday and Happy 4 month anniversary (almost forgot about that) my bad

haha~~he was so shocked and excited by my suggestion. chalet is just a little thing that is in my mind. I have some plan which is even bigger than that. Of cause, I am not going to tell him. I dun know his reaction would be so big..... It's funny to see him like that, talking with no sense at all.

Anata, I love you!

Sometime, I just feel very hard to talk to him, I know I am not good at showing my true self to the world. But I dun know what should i say to let him know what i am really thinking about. And i dun even dare to say it out, I am so scare that he will interpret otherwise.......he is good at that.....>~<

Two of us are so different, he is the attention-seeker but I just like to be a normal girl. For cosplay, he loves it so much, but that is just a hobby to me. I am trying to enter his world, trying to understand, trying to like what he likes. First time, doing all this stuff and I know I wouldn't able to get inside his world. So tire, feels like to give up, maybe single will be easy for me. No need to think that much , sweet and simple lifestyle. But now no way I can just let him go, I cant. I fall too deep, I did warn myself before that, but that is something I cant control. That is relationship.

Maybe is about the weather, my mood is really not there, alone in my room , my mind is in mess, I dun know what I am talking about and thinking about. I want he to chat with me, but I know he needs to wake up early in the morning. I cant be so selfish, however I dun want to be a good girl, I want to do something crazy. Really !!!

He likes to say "fair" this word, or we like to say that, but please nothing is fair in this world. Nothing is fair!

Now I am going to cry for awhile, no reason , just want to let it out, everything and anything. It is good to be a girl, if you are not happy then just cry it out loud. After that everything will be okay again.

well 2011 just started, getting older,but still cheerful. My r/s is going well, but anata ban a lot of thing which including: some clothes( those that expose too much >~< , pls define "expose") clubbing (I really want to go ,but he will be mad at me for sure >~<) And my result, haha~~OMG~~F***ing~~bad~~~I really need to work hard before my parents force me to break up with him...So ganbatta~~~O(∩_∩)O~

sum up:

1. be a good girl ( dun make anata and my parents worry)

2. study hard (make sure my GPA can move up to 3.5)

3. eat at home more often ( always went out and dinner outside, need more family time)

4. look for some charas that can cos with my anata as couple

5. and try not to cos with other guys

6. .......( To be continue)

双子是不是真的爱你，只有他们自己才知道，也许和双子谈恋爱，你时刻能感受到他热烈的爱。但他的痴心，他的死心塌地，是不是在演戏，只有他才最明白。双子在爱情中的表现往往会让恋人认为双子已经爱到了死去活来的地步了，加之双子那些信口就来的甜言蜜语台词，会让人认为双子简直就是无可就要的痴情种。但没有人知道双子这样做也许只不过是觉得好玩罢了，其实他对待这份感情也没那么用心，因为他们对待每段感情的态度没有什么不同，都是深切地爱，无情地离开。用演技表示痴情从而获得真心也许正是双子恋爱的乐趣所在吧。

Normally, I find guys who using perfume are a little too gay or too niang. Or maybe another way, guys should not use perfume......>.<>Specially, when I can smell his perfume on my cloths or on my shoulder( okay, sounds a bit wrong><)

It feels good!

Maybe he is niang in some ways, but I just like it, I like to see he plays around with friends, like the way his talk and his humorous......and torture........very glad that he doesn't know I have a blog, so he cant see this...... haha

Really, I am in love with him, I dun mind move one step forwards, haha crazy thought......However, I dun want to tell him how much I love him.....I am evil girl......^^

To Toshiro/Alex: Anata, suki, I love you more than you think ! BUT I am not going to tell you that......~\(≧▽≦)/~

Cant believe he is mine, I dun know how long we will be together, so I choose not to think about that, BUT sometimes just worry. What if we break up ,what if he doesn't love me anymore. Will we still be friends?

So words for future me: No matter what happened, life still goes on, always move forwards, you are the best actress, so smile!

L is for the way you look at me
O is for the only one I see
V is very, very extraordinary
E is even more than anyone that you adore can
Love is all that I can give to you
Love is more than just a game for two
Two in love can make it
Take my heart and please don't break it
Love was made for me and you

天秤座
以天秤喜欢犹犹豫豫的个性来说，并不是一个拿得起放得下的星座，即使在受伤的那一刻假装坚强，甚至逼自己快乐，也总有一天会暴露悲伤的心湖。他们一开始喜欢一个人，会恋上那种淡淡的甜味，随着这种甜味越来越浓，当忍不住破茧而出，不管是提起胆子的直接告白，还是委婉的说出爱慕之情，天秤一定早在心中期望了肯定的回应，于是，告白被拒，他们是怎样也无法释怀的。敏感的天秤，实在太喜欢想太多了，也正是因为这样，暗恋对象的一句无意关心话语，一个温柔的眼神，甚至顺带的帮忙，都容易在天秤心中误会为有意。于是，犹豫再三，经过了许多个辗转反侧的无眠夜，紧张的主动告白后，等来的却只是一句对不起，只能做朋友。天秤会突然觉得自己很可笑，原来一切只是海市蜃楼，原来真的是自己想太多了。感性的天秤怎么忘得了这段回忆，想起自己那时的一厢情愿就感到悲哀，就像是沉浸在一场甜蜜浪漫的美梦中，却在最激动的时刻被无情摇醒，被告知，别妄想了，你根本不配。对于天秤来说，告白被拒的痛，只会如影随行，释怀吗？不知道有没有那么一天。
ya that is me~~~~I am just a stupid girl....with stupid dream....now I want to wake up, can I?

It is over lol~~~~my holiday~~~~~ back to sch is fun ,but oso tired , I pass Dfun and FunCE ~\(≧▽≦)/~ haha~~~that is good enough for me........

One more thing is I change my Facebook account, WANTING, if you see this post pls add me in Facebook wenting_tee@hotmail.com~~~~~~~~~~thx

tmr is my last ppr Funce,after that i will free for 2weeks.............~\(≧▽≦)/~.............but i still have training and camp and class outing and blah blah blah~~~~~so may be not that free.............my holiday.................╮(╯▽╰)╭

I just wann to meet him, i miss him.............OMG i go crazy liao~~~~~~~ every time i walk around the sch, just hope to meet him~~~~~~~~~

BTW, my CKT exam die liao~~~~~hope DFun not that difficult~~hope so

I am not a les, so I am normal......Finally there is someone attract my attention and I cant get over it.........haha~~ dun ask me who he is , I am not going to tell anyone.......just keep to myself, no one will hurt me...........coz he just may be someone passes by,wont make much different to my life~~~so just like it be~~~~haha~~~I dun even know what I am talking about~~~~~~

ok~~honestly, it is not possible for us to.................................................................................................

a little bit sad~~~~but nvm in this world only man and woman, so I will find my MR RIGHT

now i fully understand what is means by" when you have time, but no $. when you have $, then you don't have time."

My schedule is like all full, can't find any time for shopping, or go out with friends. So what should I do. I WANT GO SHOPPING, I WANT GO MOVIE, I WANT GO K-BOX...........................I WANT $ ALSO...............................

Now i have all in total 4cca, i going to die soon. BUT i think it is fun also,tmr i will go for Archery training, wish me luck. GOD please help me......